Thursday: My sister and Terry have moved south to Georgia to be with Shari, Mark and their grandkids. Their house here is still very full of their "stuff" and is in need of selling--but Terry and Mark are going to handle that down the road a bit. It's strange, after almost two years of them being .5 miles away to now have them move so far away. However, I am thankful this has happened. Ruthanne's memory issues are progressing more and more. Having never been in my sister's company for more than a few hours at a time over the last 50+ years, I was completely naive how exactly it would work seeing her on an almost-daily-basis. I am so sad about her memory loss. I had no idea it could be this difficult to deal with. Terry does an amazing job orchestrating their lives! However, when Terry required surgery back in October, it became very evident that both of them needed better care in their home than they were getting here. Thankfully, Shari and Mark have a "cottage" on their property, about 50' from the main house, and with a tiny bit of renovation it will be quite suitable for Ruthanne and Terry. They really loved being at Calvary Church--but they need more than just a once-a-week uplifting. They are both terribly lonely. I think being around their grandchildren will be a good thing! I think Terry will feel relieved of the 24/7 burden of taking care of Ruthanne--they will have good support there.
The other HUGE change in my life is that my Kaity doesn't want to come over any more. She is 12.5 and there is really nothing she is interested in doing over at my house. It's not that there is nothing to do here--she just doesn't want to do those particular things. PLUS ... she is a very "social" person--and we have had some of her friends come over and I've fed them and played games, etc.; but Kaity just isn't interested in coming here anymore. What does that feel like for me?
Sad ...
Depressing ...
Lonely ...
It was inevitable ... I knew eventually Kaity would not want to come over anymore. I knew this! I just was hoping it would be off in the future somewhere more distant than ... N O W. I wracked my brain to figure out "fun" stuff we could do together; but it's difficult to compete with the instant entertainment she receives from social media and video games. My heart aches. I feel lost.
SO ... I am asking the Lord to help me know what to do now. How can I serve Him? Should I get more involved at church? They are always looking for helpers. And I do not want to WASTE these last years of my life doing ... nothing ... nothing of lasting value in His eyes.
Please show me, Lord. Help me to know who to talk to and where to start. Help me not to be afraid ... and please help me with this loss.
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